How do you fill your day...

As per my last post (TVT...) I went into work for a visit and to discuss when I would be returning. I confirmed with my new manager that October is still when I wanted to return and at this stage it would be full-time. I did tell him that I was considering part-time work but would let them know if my preference changed. My manager is a young guy and I think was just trying to butter me up and even suggested bringing James into the office while I worked if I didn't want to leave him! Could you imagine working in a professional office with a one year old? I don't think so! In the mean time they would hire a temp in my position until my return. Apparently my replacement wasn't working anyway so they are glad she is finishing up.

While I was at work it was great to see all my work mates, some I hadn't seen since before James was born. They were all excited to meet my little man and he was very well behaved. A question that came up a few times was, "How are you filling your days"? While for some people this would be insulting (that raising and taking care of a five month old isn't enough what else am I supposed to be doing???), for me I found the question hard to answer. How was I filling my days???

Most days are spent feeding, changing, playing, reading to and cuddling James. I don't spend a lot of time out visiting people as most people I know are working and walking around a shopping centre (mall) for hours on end doesn't appeal to either James or I. Other than walking around the block, going to James' check-ups or the odd mother's group catch-up I don't really get out of the house. I think this is why I'm getting excited about starting swimming classes and I'm also going to start going to the local library once a week for a baby rhyme time. How do you fill your days?

TVT...

I'm following Heather's lead on introducing Thought Vomit Thursdays. Keep in mind that in Australia it already is Thursday. So here goes:

• I'm over the rain! We've just entered autumn here in Australia so the wet season in the Tropics should be slowing down but we've already had over 650mm (25.5 inches) in March already!
• We were visiting my family, four hours south of where we live and we accidently left our stroller in my Mum's car. Thank goodness we are heading down for Easter so we can pick it up then and until then we've borrowed a friends.
• For a couple of years I've wanted to learn a second language. And for some reason sign-language was something I was interested in. Now that James is here I've done some reading on Baby Sign Language, so we could learn it together. I'm excited to get started and have got the first six 'signs' I'll attempted to teach James.
• Still on teaching James new things, now that he is approaching six months I'm going to enroll him in Swim Classes! Being in a nation where swimming is a popular past time (we have a spa, my parents have a beach house and my sister has a pool) it is enevitable that James will be in or around water. So for fun and safety, we will teach him how to swim. I can't wait to see how he goes!
• I am lucky enough to be able to have a full twelve months off on maternity leave. But yesterday I received a call from my work, letting me know my temporary replacement has given her resignation and will be finishing next week. They want me to come in for a meeting to discuss when I will be starting back at work??? All they have to do is take a look at my leave form, I'll be back in October and not a minute sooner! I'm still going in for the meeting (to be polite mostly) so I'll make sure to update you.
• After my Food post the other day, we've tried banana and James is not a fan! I don't know whether it was the taste or texture (I just mashed it with a fork) but he didn't eat one bite. So we'll try banana again next week.
• For the first time in my life I have stroller envy. I always wondered why people get more than one stroller. Surely if you have one you don't need another one. But at my latest Mother's Group meeting one of the ladies had a new stroller and I loved it. Light weight, not too wide so you can't get through doorways, heaps of storage underneath the seat! I'm in love with that stroller!

Food Glorious Food...

At James' four month check-up, the nurse suggested introducing some solids into his diet as he had become unsettled at night. He had started waking hungry once, sometimes twice, a night. We had gone back in time to the newborn phase and my sleep was really suffering. I had started to give him a top up EBM bottle after his night time feed, but this wasn't a long term solution for me. So we started giving James some rice cereal at lunch time and then moved it to dinner time. He was back to sleeping from 7pm to 6:30am! Since then we have introduced pumpkin, pear, apple, potato, sweet potato and natural yogurt. He loves savoury not too fussed on sweet (unlike his mother!) and was a little unsure about yogurt but everything we've introduced he's eaten.

Stop taking photos of me and give me more pumpkin!

My Breastfeeding Journey PAIL Post

Like a lot of first time mothers, I knew I wanted to breastfeed. I don't know whether it was because of my fertility struggles or because I had placenta previa (that required me to have a c-section) but I was determined to breastfeed at any cost. I felt like I couldn't conceive or deliver a baby without help but I was going to feed my baby, no matter what!

While I was in hospital, breastfeeding seem to come very naturally to me and I thought 'this is great I'm one of the lucky ones'. My nipples were sore but I knew this was normal with early breastfeeding. Once I was home I was consistently on the look out for early signs of mastitis but didn't even think about how sore my nipples were getting. Looking back on this time, I didn't realise the pain medication I was on, was probably blocking the extent of my nipple pain.

About a week in I felt lumps in my right breast so I immediately starting draining this breast, massaging etc. to get rid of the lumps. I even made an appointment with a lactation consultant to check it out. By the time of my appointment I had managed to get rid of the lumps before they were infected but now my right nipple had started to grow more and more painful. The lactation consultant had a look at the nipple and found a wet spot. The wet spot was a crack in the nipple which was being prevented from healing because of it location. The lactation consultant advised me to keep it dry and it would heal within a couple of weeks.

Well it took five weeks to fully heal and those five weeks were so painful a few times I thought about giving up. The pain was 'toe curling' and I dreaded every time I had to feed James. Thankfully expressing wasn't as painful, so in the end I expressed from my right breast instead of feeding directly and give James the milk from a bottle. Another couple of days of this pain and I think I would have stopped feeding. I can see how for some ladies, breastfeeding is too painful.

Four months in and I'm so glad I persevered. I now enjoy feeding James and spending this time with him.  I had originally thought I would breastfeed until James was six months, but now we are getting closer to this time, I think I will continue for another couple of months.  We are hoping to try for another baby when James turns one, so I would like to have a bit of 'time off' before we go down the TTC road again. 

Too soon...

We have a video monitor so we can keep an eye on James when he sleeps in his room. In the early days it was a blessing and a curse. A blessing when he finally went to sleep and we could see him relaxed. And a curse because watching him becomes very addictive and things just don't get done when we start watching him.

Lately the video monitor has been a way to watch James' nautical work out. He has become quite the mover and shaker when he goes into his cot. We always put him on his back to start off but he soon rolls onto his side then moves to face the foot of the cot. Then he rolls onto his belly to sleep. Sometimes he won't make it onto his belly and falls asleep on his side, it's so cute.

I knew this is one of the reasons that you put a baby into a cot, to keep them enclosed. But I thought this kind of rolling and moving into different positions wouldn't happen for months or at least until our little man was six months. It seems too early, at four months, to be able to do this. Or maybe I'm having a hard time accepting he is getting older and is going to continue to surprise me.

Losing my hair...

I have thin, straight, brown hair. It's pretty boring really but when I was pregnant, I enjoyed the good "pregnant hair". In a matter of weeks, my hair turned from lifeless to full of body and very luscious (if I do say myself). It sounds like a shampoo hair commercial! Three and a half months of post-pregnancy has turned my hair back into the old lifeless hair I had before. But it seems to be falling out. I've done a bit of research and this is normal but it is so annoying! I've left hair everywhere, all over the bathroom, clothes, hair brush, my car and even on poor James. Apparently the shedding will slow down over the next few months so I'll just have to wear hats until then!

In other news James is growing like a weed. I can't believe he'll be four months next week. He's weight gain has slowed down but he's getting longer. I've even starting putting him into jumpsuits for six to nine months olds just to get the length.

One year ago today I had the FET that would eventually become a BFP and then our son. It's still difficult to imagine this living breathing little boy was the blasty we saw on the microscope a year ago. And it even makes me a little sadder about our first failed IVF and the baby that blasty might have been. We still have one Frostie ready when we are and that makes me a little excited about who that (hopefully) will become.

Three months...

Well the Party Animal has been tamed, for now anyway J  We tweaked his night-time routine which seems to have worked for the past couple of weeks.  I now nurse him in the dark without any distractions, no noise, no talking etc, in his room and then straight to bed.  Sometimes he might stir but only for a couple of minutes and then off to sleep.  Most nights we might not hear from him again until 5am.  What a little champion!  There is a lot of trial and error with parenting, more so than they tell you while you're pregnant.  It's just working out what your little one likes and dislikes.

Now for the fun part here are some photos of my little man.

James has now starting grabbing objects and wants to get everything in his mouth!  I've had to start putting bibs on him because of all the dribble from sucking on his hands!  I was changing is clothes every couple of hours.  No sign of teething yet but I'm keeping an eye out. 

For the past week I keep having dreams about being pregnant again.  When I left hospital some of the midwives told me I'd be back within 18 months.  When I did ask Dr J about when we could use our last frozen embryo, he told us to wait six to nine months for my body to recover and then try naturally for six months before coming back for a FET.  I was keen just to go straight to the FET.  After trying for two years, it seems almost impossible that we could fall pregnant naturally.  But Dr J has seen a lot of his patients use IVF for their first and then fall naturally for their second.  It seems a bit like a urban myth to me but it would be wonderful to get pregnant without any medical intervention.  I would like to have another baby within two years.  I'm only getting older and now that I'm thirty (which isn't really that old for another pregnancy), I can really hear my body clock ticking.